Thursday, June 4, 2015

Steel Cage Heart

My heart is a cage,
locked up deep inside,
with walls that others see,
as a place to avoid.

Those who get close,
get locked up within,
never escaping,
this heart shaped prison.

So as I watch you,
slowly walk away,
from the tall walls,
that surround this cage.

I realize that you’re
still inside these bars,
for venturing too close,
allowed in its walls.

You explored the prison,
mapping out its design,
but you were snatched away,
and my heart declined.

So now the prison,
locks, again away,
from those who tiptoe near,
its tall walls again.

Mon Cher

I love when he smiles and his eyes shine
When he laughs and shows me his truthful self
Hopefully he will stay near by my side
For his love is more than a rich man’s wealth

His love means more to me than anything
How I wish to show him how much I feel
His hand holds mine and leaves it tingling
For just his touch makes my head spin and reel

Brightening my day just by being near
Holding me close as we slumber at night
Even in the dark I will never fear
Because he shall always be at my right

He makes me heartbeat fly like a white dove
I know that he is my only true love

Foreign

I look at these words so foreign to me
So far from home that I cannot bare it
I'm asking for bread but they give me tea
So different and new I'm feeling sick

Rent a room to call a place all my own
New things that I don't know how to use
Can't find a job so I must take a loan
Every interview I go they refuse

I pay my rent and stow the rest away
Months gone by and I yearn to see his face
I'll bring him here so he is safe with me
A place where they won't kill a certain race

He's here with me and now we're truly safe
It's strange how I'm now in love with this place

Untitled

The little boy who skips,
silently as he does,
plays with his friends,
the ones he’s made in his head.

Not long after, much hasn’t changed,
all except where he spends his days,
sitting and rocking at his desk,
punishment given for not being teacher’s best,

Small years fly by and new school begins,
awkward and shy with no friends,
not a soul to talk to and no one to love,
the boy sheds a tear for things that can’t be undone.

Year passes by still and he’s gaining courage,
little by little and finds someone sweet,
but bitterness comes as  they lose their sweet taste,
not alone though, but scared to communicate.

A year rolls by and he steps into school,
making more friends and renewing them too,
the boy found love in the rightest of places,
smiling with friends he hides his past,
moving onward to make a brighter future.

Woods of Regrets

I woke up looking at the dull sky, trees littering the view of mine. I tried to speak, but no words came out of my mouth, as if I was mute. I sat up, looking at my surroundings. The woods around me were thick and crowded, but some gaps where trees did not grow. Pine needles littered the ground around my legs and the scent of fresh dew caught my nose. The sky was dull and grey, where no spots of blue could be seen. Even the sun did not show. A short breeze gusted through the wooded area and I wrapped myself in my sweater some more, shivering. My hair was up in a bun, my eyes shifted unsettlingly. I had no memory of how I got here, or anything of that matter.
Trying to speak again, I managed to croak out 'Hello?' before realizing my throat was the cause of the muteness. Getting up, I brushed pine needles off of my legs, my cut off shorts exposing my mid thigh. The sweat on my skin stuck to the pine needles and made the removal make me shiver, as the wet skin made contact to the brisk air around it, no longer covered by the wooden barrier. I walked, trying to find a source of water, as I did I began to think.
My name is Emily Rothoburg, I am seventeen years old, and I am a senior in high school. I have a mother who works at a bookstore, and a dad who works at a realty company. I like to run and write poetry. My favorite band is Of Monsters & Men, and I love the fall. And I can't seem to think of anything else about myself, crap.
I look around me, these woods seem endless, and the breeze is killing me. How did I get here, and where am I? I walked a little forward beginning to see a clearing in the woods. I picked up the pace, making sure to be careful of where I stepped, not wanting to trip in my Toms. As I reached the clearing, I saw a rippling creek near the opposite end. I quickly sprinted over, suddenly craving water like it was oxygen. Reaching it's bank, I knelt down to cup water into my hands. Almost lustfully I drank the water by the handfuls, not stopping till I was full on the wonderful liquid.
I glance around, suddenly feeling vulnerable in the open space of the clearing. The feeling I was being watched grasped at my mind uncontrollably as a chill ran down my spine. I the steam was almost silent, and the breeze wasn't strong enough to cause the branches to sway from its force. This place really was too quiet. Nothing happens in the passing minutes, and the tension I feel lessens a bit. I stand up, but I'm struck with a sudden realization.
The pain in my head is unreal, I look around me seeing that the car is smashed to pieces. The throbbing
in my head makes it hard to focus my vision or my thoughts, and I try to move. I'm restrained, and see my seatbelt is still on. That's when the engine caught fire.
I open my eyes screaming, what was that? I had fallen in my strange hallucination. I look over at the creek, which is still rippling slowly. Only a girl is sitting at the bank. Not drinking from it though, but staring at me cautiously.
The girl's dark black hair was tangled and matted, her eyes seemed dull and grey. The breeze had picked up, and the sky had darkened. The scene chilled the me to the bone. Slowly standing up, both the girl and I never stopped looking at each other, till the girl broke the transfixation first. Running like a banshee, the girl sprinted back into the woods. Not being able to help myself, I ran after.
Who was she? Why was she frightened of me? These thoughts kept running through my head as I ran after the girl. Her dark hair meshed with the oncoming darkness of night, and the woods became longer and shadier as I continued to run. Eventually she got lost in the darkness ahead of me, and I halted my pursuit after the mysterious young girl.
I glanced around me, seeing that I have lost the way I came. I sit down slowly, waining sleep because of my tired legs. The darkness frightens me though, and I wish I knew where I was. The lurking feeling of slumber crept up to me though, and soon took over.
When I woke up it was light again, and I glanced up at the sky. Still littered with the high tree tops, the sky was blue now, cloudless and beautiful.  I began to sit up, but the sounds of birds stopped me. The forest sounds natural for once, and the sounds were warming to my heart. The change of mood in the mysterious forest was really helping me with my sudden appearance in it, and also my fright. The shock of not knowing had faded away with the night, and now it seemed like a bright new beginning for what I could make of it. I stand up, brushing more of those annoying pine needles off my legs and sweater. That's when the images in my head come back.
The engine caught fire and I'm rushing to get my seat belt off.
"Zeke! Izzie! Are you okay?" I franticly get the restraining object off of me, and look at the back seat. The sight is sickening, the amount of blood caused me to begin to throw up right where I was. The whole back of the car was crushed, the semi truck that had rolled onto us smashed it to pieces.
I awoke, crunched into a ball again, tears running down my face. I wipes my tears and try to settle myself.
"Are you okay Miss?" A small voice from behind me catches my attention, and I whip around. A small boy in shorts and a striped shirt was staring at me. His black hair was messy and tangled, his brown eyes like chocolate orbs. I pause for a second, looking at him, then slowly nod my head.
"Were you crying?" I nod my head again. The little boy folds his arms and pouts a bit.
"Well, being sad won't get you anywhere, so try to be happy. My sister doesn't like it when you're screaming." I just stare at him when the memory comes back.
A little boy was smiling at me, a little girl holding his hand as they walked with me.
"Ely, Izzie and I don't wanna leave yet!" The boy let go of his sisters hand so he could fold his arms and began to pout. I smile, and kneel down next to him.
"Well, being sad won't get you anywhere, so try being happy. We got to see the zoo today, but it's six o'clock now and we have to go home." I look at him hoping he'd give up his childish protests of wanting to stay at the zoo.
"Miss? Miss, are you okay?" I snap out of the memory, but I won't respond to the boy, I just keep staring at him. He looks exactly like the boy I saw in my flashback.
"No, I'm not. But that doesn't matter." I look at the boy some more, why was he here? How did I know him? The faint rustle from a tree behind him alerted me to another presence. A little head with long matted black hair appeared from behind a tree.
"Is this your sister?" I motion to where she was. When she realized I had seen her, her head ducked  behind the tree once more. The boy instantly was on guard, and stepped in between where she was and I.
"Yes, and she doesn't like to talk to people, so leave her alone." He tightened his arms around his chest and made it clear that he wasn't going to move unless I acknowledged what he said.
"I won't go near her, unless you say I can, or she wants me to." The young boy seemed pleased with what I said and relaxed slightly, but was still on guard.
"Do you know how I got here?" I know it was a stupid question, but these two children are the only two people I've seen since I woke up in these woods. The boy gave me a toothy grin and nodded his head.
"You're here because you have to remember and forgive. That's what the woman in the suit said to Izzie and I." A woman in a suit? So there is an adult here too? Why hasn't she come to help us? And Izzie, the name of the girl in my reels of recollections I'm having. I'm guessing he was addressing his sister. Does that mean these are the two children I saw in my vision? I squatted down so he and I were eye level, and motioned him to come a little closer.
     "I'm about to ask a very silly question, but is your name Zeke?" The boy looked at me strangely and nodded vigorously, "Then I think we have met before. My name is Emily, is Izzie your sister behind the tree?"
Izzie's head popped out from behind the tree again, looking at me very closely as her brother and I talked. She didn't seem very trusting, or maybe she was just nervous.
"I've never met you before." Izzie’s voice was quiet and gentle, the opposite of her brothers loud and hyper tone. Zeke looked at me closely, then his eyes opened up a little wider.
“No, no, Izzie look. It’s Ely.” I stare at Izzie as she contemplates what he has said.
“Hmmm, maybe she is. The lady in the suit was nice enough, so Emily probably is too.” With that, Izzie walked out from behind the tree, and stood next to Zeke, grabbing his hand.
The most intense pain I have ever felt poured into my head, and I fell over. The two little children in front of me gasped as they faded away into the nothingness of what I saw in my fainted dreams.
The traffic was insane today, so many cars were merging into different lanes in hope of moving faster, only causing near accidents. That’s when it happened. We started to pick up speed when we needed to suddenly stop again. A driver too close to another hit the car in front of them and started a domino effect of pile up on the freeway. I couldn’t steer away and I could hear my little siblings yell in the back seat.
“Hold on guys!” With that I hit the car in front of me at around twenty miles per hour, and the air bag deployed, knocking me unconscious. I awoke to a head ache and gurgled sounds. I tried to get out, but I had forgotten that I was wearing a seat belt. Fumbling with the strap, I saw the engine begin to catch flame in front of me.
Finally managing to free myself I turned to help my little siblings. The back of the car was crushed, with no room. Blood littered the back of the car. I vomited seeing the horrifying sight of what minutes ago were my six year old little brother and sister. I turn away, feeling tears streak down my face as I struggle to escape the vehicle. Not managing to use the handle, I scooted myself out the newly opened window of my car. I slid onto another car’s hood who hit the side of my car head on, breaking the window.
Struggling to walk off the wreckage, a man found me and began to help me out. I look back and see that a semi-truck had flipped from the crash, landing on my car and a few others. The tears pouring down my face made my eyes burn, and the adrenaline coursing through my body was beginning to dissipate as the threat of death disappeared. As the man finally got me to a medic, I fainted, watching the horror around me turn black.
I opened my eyes to see I was in a clearing now, Zeke and Izzie were holding a woman with red hair’s hands.
“We understand you couldn’t have done anything, Ely.” Zeke looked at me sadly.
“It’s not like you would have known.” Izzie let go of the woman’s hand and hugged me, Zeke following behind her.
“It wasn’t your fault Ely, and we still love you. Thank you for taking us to the zoo.”
With that, my little siblings went back to the woman with red hair, and they all began to walk away. As they moved further away, the clearing became blurred, and disappeared into whiteness.
I opened my eyes in a white hospital room, the sterile light above me seemed as bright as the natural sun to my sensitive eyes. I look over to see a nurse with red hair is cleaning up the table in the room, setting a pot of flowers on the table as well.
Being sad won't get you anywhere, so try being happy. The words stuck in my head as the nurse realized I was awake, and went to get the doctor. I’m sorry Zeke. I’m sorry Izzie. I know it wasn’t my fault. Thank you for letting me know though, that you don’t blame me for something I would have blamed myself for. I love you too.
End